Soneto quebrado (Broken Sonnet)

Not long enough, I met this girl. Her name was Ileanna. Ileanna is a college student studying Game Design in a Community College where this college is known for media arts. She not that smart but she always make sure that every single detail of her work is almost perfect before the time of submission comes. As I continue my long walk aka journey, I met this guy. His name is Amando. Amando is a university student taking up Hospitality Management in a famous university where they have a strong foundation for this kind of program.

Ileanna’s college and Amando’s university are co-related with each other. Every summer Ileanna’s college always create courses where university students like Amando can apply and credit it to the next semester of his university. This summer, there was a course named “Psychology of Human Behaviour” that is being offered for everyone; whether they are a university student or a college student.

During the enrollment for this course, Amando was on the line waiting for his turn to use the computer to apply and pay for that course. As he waits for his turn, he saw Ileanna on the other side of the line. He was so mesmerized with the beauty of Ileanna but he thought that it’s not yet time for him to get a new one.  After he enrolled for that course, he tried to catch up Ileanna but he fail because he lost his sight with Ileanna.

Summer Classes have started and the community college and the university grounds are so busy because of the students. Not far enough, Amando saw the girl that he’s dreaming for. Same thing, he tried his best to catch up with her but unfortunately he did not catch her up. It’s already 9:00am and the classes started. Without noticing Ileanna, Amando sat beside him. After couple of minutes, the guy just notice that the Girl of his dreams was sitting besides him. After five minutes, He was shocked because he was sitting beside his dream girl. Kind a nervous with the sight that he saw Ileanna. After the few moments of shockness,  Amando tried his luck again to greet Ileanna and….

“Hi miss, I am a university student and I am not kind a familiar with your college; can I ask you about your college?”
“Sure! Absolutely! By the way sir; What’s your name?”
” Oh! I forgot to introduce myself… I am Amando Ortega a Hospitality Management Student but just call me Amando..how about you?”
“I’m Illeanna Montemayor, a Game Design student from this college. Just call me Illeanna”

Finally, the two met and talked. As they talk, Illeanna toured Amando around the campus and give some information about the campus. After the tour, the split up cause they have to go to their respective class where they are focusing. During their 2nd day on of their summer class, they see each other again and talk. After a short talk…

“Illeanna, can I get your number?”
“Sure! Here’s my number… (647) 777-8877″
“Thanks!”
“I’ll just text you later so that you can get my number and saved it…”
“Sure No worries”

After their short talk, both are still likewise kind a strange to each other but the both sides are feeling awkward when they are seeing each other. During her class, Illeanna saw her closet friend Isabelle. She knows Isabelle for a kind a long time but their friendship are way deep. After class, Illeanna told her awkward feeling towards Amando and….

“Isa, I don’t know what to do? I feel so awkward this time. If I see Amando, I feel like anxious and all the stuff where a girl will feel after her tragic relationship.”
“Hmmm…I thought you have already a guy that you want.”
” I know but…”
“Remember what I have told you before that he has plan going to Spain and stay their for long”
“Oh yeah! So what’s the progress?”

(Staring with each other)

“Oh no don’t tell me he’s all set…”
(nodding)
“Yeah! He’s all set….I just saw his status through Imagebook and he is asking for prayers for his interview at the Spanish embassy”
“Oh no!”
“Yeah! but that’s life! I will just let God write this story because he is the author of my life… :)”
“I agree with you”

Their talking was being cut because their food was being served already and they eat their dinner and still talk but about school already. After they had their sumptuous meal, they headed through a subway station and go on different ways.

Illeanna was in the bus and all of the sudden her phone rang and he got a message of Amando saying that that’s him and asking to save his number. She answer back and save the number of Amando in her phone. After saving it, her phone rang but it’s not just only a text but…

“Hello?”
“Hi Illeanna! This is Amando, How are you?”
“I am so tired and heading home…How about you?”
“Aw, how’s your study so far? Are you having a hard time?
” Well not really, my eyes are getting strained due to the radiation of the computer from our school.”
“That’s kind a not good”
“I know eh?! But that will be my career after this”
” Yeah your right”

They still talk and talk over their phones and when Illeanna’s stops had been announce; she ask Amando if they can talk tomorrow cause she is getting off and she will do a lot of things for her portfolio.

As the summer semester continues they, Amando and Illeanna keep on seeing each other and asking each other about their backgrounds. Summer semester is almost over and….

“Illeanna?”
“Yes?”
“I want to tell you something”
“What is it?”
“Can we go somewhere else like let’s have a true date cause we keep on seeing each other but it’s all about getting to know each other thing though..”
“Sure! When and where”
“This Saturday, I’ll pick you up at your house at around 7:30pm”
“Okay then…I’ll see you then and before we leave on Saturday, I will introduce you to my parents”
“Okay…No problem at all”

Saturday is fast approaching and the two are getting excited. Their minds are filled of a lot of questions, thoughts and anything that they can think of. Finally Saturday has arrived and the true day is already their. Fine Night and lovely aura, Amando picked up Illeanna and Illeanna introduced Amando to her parents. Before leaving the Illeanna’s place…

“Illeanna put this blindfold”
“Why?”
“Just put it into your face..no more questions ask”
“Okay”

Illeanna nervously putting the blindfold to her eyes and Amando guides her to his car. After a 35 minute drive, they finally reached a fine dinning restaurant where Amando’s friend is the owner of that restaurant. Amando guided Illeanna to their sit. After they got  their table Amando removed Illeanna’s blindfold and…

“Oh my Gosh! This is so beautiful! Why? What?” (She became speechless)
“Illeanna just sit back and relax its on me.”

After they are settled…

“Illeanna, ever since that I saw you, I felt different on you. I cannot explain this feelings that I have deep with in me”
“Same here, ever since that I  met you in our course and talk to you a lot I felt different on you, I cannot also explain what’s going on with me. I had already a girl talk with Isabelle but still she told me it’s up to me”
“Really?!”
“Yeah! For sure!”

They continue this conversation and….

“Illeanna, I know that we know each other for 3 months but I want to tell this to you”
“What is it?”
“I like you. I like not just because of the way your dress, shape or something else. I like you because of your attitude”
(Illeanna, blushed)
“Amando, I have something to tell you”
“What is it?”
” I like you too but I am still scared of falling again. I just had a tragic relationship and still coping up with the wounds that I had last year”

Amando was kind a upset but….

“Illeanna, I know that your still scared but I am willing to wait for you..”
“Are you sure with that? I might change after a few years…remember we don’t know what will happen next.”
“I know that, that’s why even if we do like each other I still want to be your friend or friends with special benefits”
(Illeanna thinks deeply)
(Amando is waiting)

After 15 minutes….

“Okay, then…I agree with your condition.”
“really?!”
“don’t you want to?”
“No, No, No…I am fine with that”

Days, months, and a year have past the their friendship grew stronger. This is the first time I saw two individuals are getting along even if they do have different educational background. Not long enough during Christmas, the two decided to go to Niagara to have their first Christmas vacation. They both agree with each other that they will have their vacation during their school break.

Their school had finished and finally they can go to vacation, Illeanna prepared a lot of things and might as well Amando. Saturday has arrived and both of them are already prepared, Amando drives his car going to Illeanna’s place to pick her up. Amando arrived already at Illeanna’s place.  When Amando ring the doorbell, one of his siblings answer the door and let Amando in. As he waited to the living room, Illeanna was still in the on her bedroom still preparing herself. Not long enough, Illeanna went down with her things and all set to their destination. Amando was so mesmerised on Illeanna’s appearance. Before living Illeanna’s place, the two bid goodbye to Ileanna’s family and after that off they go to Niagara.

Everything now is all set. Things, food for the whole day, their hotel where they will rest, and lastly the restaurant where they will eat for their romantic dinner. As they hit the road, the two are keep on talking so that no one will fall asleep as the go to their 3 day long date. As they talk…

“Illeanna, it’s been a while since we meet if I am not mistaken.”
“I know that Amando, it’s been a while since we know each other”
“So yeah what are you plans for this year?”
“Well, since I am already done with my school; I might get a job first and enjoy my career as a graphic designer.”
“Nice!”
“How about you, what are your plans for this year?”
“Well still I am not yet done with my university, I will finish my school and I might get a part-time job as I study”
“That will be great!”
“I know eh?!”

As they keep on talking and talking, they have reach their destination.  They went first to Hilton Fallsview and check-in to a 2 bedroom deluxe suite so that they can save money and at the same time they will have also a privacy as they sleep. After they check-in, leave their things in their bedroom, and set things up for their wonderful tour; they went to the lounge to relax even more so that they can chat and get to know each other. As they went to the lounge area…

“Illeanna, can I ask you something?”
“Sure! What is it?”
“I am afraid that you would still say no but I just want to ask…Can I court you this time”

(thinking so hard)

“Amando, it’s also been a while that we are together but if you really can wait up until I turned 25 for sure I will say yes to you”
(Kind a disappointed)
“Okay, I will wait for it, I know that your still moving on but I have say I will be right here waiting for you”

Both are happy this time even if they still stay friends. Their friendship grow and time made them stronger. People that are jealous with their relationship try to destroy them but still they grew strong.  Not far enough, Illeanna is turning 25 and she is starting her career as a graphic designer all of the sudden…

“Hi, Doctor, It’s been a long time that I haven’t visit you”
“I know that Illeanna! So What are you up to this time?”
“I just want to have my annual Physical Examination cause I felt something not right with my body”
“Okay then as you wish”

Illeanna has her Physical Examination and after how many weeks…

*RRRRRRIIIIINNNNGGGG!!!!*

“Hello..”
“Hi! This is from Doctor Anderson’s office. I just want to tell you that Doctor Anderson wants to see you this Saturday. Are you available on that day?
“Sure! Please book it up for me…”
“Thanks! So Saturday at 10:30 am”
“Okay then I’ll see you on Saturday”

Saturday came and….

“Hi! Doctor Anderson, it’s been two weeks that I have seen you. How  are you?
“I am good! How about you?”
“Well still I am losing weight drastically and getting weaker this past few days”
“That’s what I want to tell you Illeanna”
“What is it doc?”
“Let’s go to my office”

They are already went to Doctor Anderson’s offices and…

“Illeanna, sad to say that you have a cancer on your liver”
(Shock and teary-eyed)
“Can you say it again doc…”
“You have Liver Cancer stage 3. This stage  is kind a dangerous if you won’t go for a surgery and chemotherapy”
“How much it will cost me doctor if I start the treatment?”
“It’s up to the insurance company that you have and OHIP coverage. If there will be an excess you have to prepare likewise a $340,000 or more.”

Illeanna is in a great shock and devastated when she heard the news about her health condition. She went home talk to her parents and…

“Mom, dad, Lucita, I have something to tell you”
Mom and dad: What is it Illeanna?
Lucita: What is it sister?
“Can we go to a quieter place like in our common area”
All: Sure

They went all to their common place and Illeanna break the news already that she has a liver cancer stage three. The whole family was so devastated when they heard the news. Illeanna’s mom, dad and younger sister cry a lot but…

“Don’t cry mom, dad and my precious sister. I have still a chance if I just let Doctor Anderson operate me and take the chemotherapy soon.”
Mom: How much it will cause us?
“Well, Doctor Anderson told me that it depends upon the coverage of my insurance and OHIP coverage and if there will be an excess, we should prepare at least $340,000 or more”
Dad: If this is for your own sake we will going to sacrifice everything for our precious daughter. We don’t want to lose you.
“Thanks for your support Mom, dad, and Lucita.”

Illeanna never told this to Amando because she doesn’t want to know what’s going on to herself. One day, the two met and…

“Hey Illeanna, how are you?”
“I am good! how about you?”
“Same as you”
“Do you want to go somewhere else?”
“Sure”
“Do you want to go to the Art Gallery Ontario”?
“Sounds fun! Okay let’s go then…”

The two went to the art gallery and visit different exhibits and all of the sudden…

*Blaaaggg*

Amando ran towards Illeanna and try to wake her up but it doesn’t work. He called a security to call an ambulance. Finally the ambulance came and try to revive Illeanna. Luckily they revive Illeanna and rush her to the nearest hospital. They arrived already to St. Michael’s Hospital and admit Illeanna to a semi private room. Amando is still there waiting for updates on how her beloved Illeanna is. The family came and saw Amando. The girl’s dad ask him how is she but still they still don’t have any updates. Finally the family doctor arrived and attended Illeanna. The girl’s mom called Amando and talk to him and…

“Amando, I have something to tell you?”
“What is it ma’am?”
“Illeanna is sick.”
“What kind of sickness ma’am”
“She has a stage 3 Liver cancer and we are all doing our best to revive her”

Amando became devastated like what the family felt when they heard the news. He doesn’t know what to do. He cried privately to the washroom and went back where his beloved love is admitted. Few more days, Illeanna is getting weaker. They still continue the therapy. One day, Amando visited her to the hospital and…

“Illeanna, how are you”
“I am just fine”
(trying not to cry in front of Illeanna)
“My dear, I love you no matter what happened. From the first time I saw you in your college and until now my love won’t change for you.”
“Same here, Amando. But I cannot promise that I can stay forever with you. you know that I am getting weaker  but I love you too. I am fighting for my family and for you. I still don’t want to leave you cause I want to have kids to be with you as we grow older.”
(Both are crying in the room)

The family arrived to she their daughter. Everything went well and…

“Mom, dad. I have something to tell you…”
“What is it my darling?”
“I and Amando wants to tie a knot soon. We both love each other and I don’t want to leave him without any remembrance at all.”
(Mom and dad are chattering with one another)
“Illeanna, are you sure with this?”
“Yeah! I am sure with this.”
“Amando, are you sure with this?”
“Yes sir! I am sure with this”

Everything is all set. Both sides are happy and ready to prepare for the great event. Lucita became their wedding coordinator. Illeanna’s mom contacted every single catering company to quote for the meals and Illeanna’s dad well set their car for the said occasion. For Amando’s family they just help for the finances.

A year past and the said event is here already. People that they have invited are their. Friends, family, relatives, acquaintances and people who wants them to see the two lovers say their vow with one another. (Of course yours truly is there to see them)

Beautiful vows are pulled out, tears are shedding and at last! The ceremony is done. The two are happy and a year already passed by and Illeanna died. Eveyone became sad including her beloved Amando. A year past again when Illeanna died. Amando went to Illeanna’s home to see his second family. They just say hi and hello and celebrate the life of Illeanna.

Ah what a sad story! Life may be rude but love never. Things may come to your life but sometimes it has to go. Ah! What a beautiful but tragic story. I guess I have to look again for another same story of love that will last forever.  I’ll see around…

 

PS: This is an another excerpt from my notebook. I hope you will reading this story

Mi Corazón Está En Llamas (My heart is on Fire)

Okay another night of writing while killing my hype in the body. I don't know what to right now but my heart is on fire to express its passion in writing. Yes I do admit aside from cooking, playing piano and violin; I love writing especially blogging. Honestly, my whole world right now is putting everything out through writing cause I do admit that sometimes my mouth put me into danger when I talk a lot. Oh well time to write again.

Honestly as this journey continues; I am starting to fall in love again. I know you will ask me "have she met her Mr. Right?" I should say no I haven't met him yet because it's not yet time to be in a relationship. I am still seeking my true self being and my self worth once more. I know that I am coping up but still time will tell me if I am healed. Honestly what it makes me write right now is I just want to say that God put me loads of love in my heart. I am not empty because of Him. I am getting fond of him every single time. Honestly no words can explain how I am falling in love with him. Honestly being alone is the best thing that you can give to yourself (Sometimes) because you can ponder on things that you want to do in your life. No wonder that sometimes it made me realize things that I should have done on the past journeys that I did.

Honestly my passion right now is to keep serving the Lord no matter what happen because he is my first lover and at the same time he is my defender and knight. Why I am so bold in proclaiming this? I am so bold because He never fail me despite that I brush him off every single time that I am confused and lost; I am always reminded that he is carrying me up. Honestly His love never fails and he won't stop loving us because He is the man of compassion.

I know for sure some of you will ask? Is she insane on what she's talking about? Is she really setting aside of browsing his Mr. Right? Honestly I am not browsing my Mr. Right. I am waiting patiently because Patience is a virtue. As you wait for God's perfect timing; for sure he will give you a hundredfold blessing. I should say I will place my entire life to His Will because for God NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE. Everything is possible to Him.

Until here then

Au reviour Passé

Okay its early morning almost time to go to work. I don't know what I am going to write this morning. I should say oh well here we go again. Honestly what drives me now is that I just want to blurt everything out through writing instead of voicing it out. Sometimes people won't listen to me or sometimes they will just create damn stories behind your back and they will turn innocent once they are facing you. That one hell of pain in the neck. I should say. I know it hard to find place or someone to trust right now. Honestly I am on that journey right now.

Honestly, It's hard to say whom you will trust and whom you will reject as a friend because nowadays people are playing good. I am telling you this, people who do that to you are the people who have loads of regrets in life. They just want to you to be destroyed at all cost. I am telling you they are clinging on to their hang ups in life. I am not pin pointing people here but yes there people like that. Most people try their best to catch you off guard and ask about your personal life. BS! (Sorry for if I am being anal to this and I am sorry to some audience who knows me personally....I AM NOT A PERFECT PERSON!) You don't have business with their personal life okay get a life! Seriously ask yourself first before making any damage to that person okay, Know that person and stop being a a**h** (Sorry again) to other people's life. Just shut up get a life and deal with your own stuff.

People who are being victimized with this two faces; my piece of advice to you is that learn how to play games with them because first things first they know how to play safe and they know when they will attack you at all cost. Not just only that they know what's you weakest point and what will be your strongest point; so be always on guard with your emotions. Better to play safe that to be sorry at the end. Honestly be who you are. Let them think that they are just a piece not Nil. Nihilism is the best thing that you can give to them. Show them what you've got because they are just an another person who thinks that they are greater than you.

Second thing always prepare safe answers to your surroundings. Be like a showbiz person because like what I have said it's better to be safe than to be sorry. There are a lot of paparazzi out there. Just wave and prepare for those questions every single day. Always smile despite that you are hurt. Wave and live like no tomorrow (but in control okay).

Third thing always make sure if you have a new friend that you have met pray for him/her because you don't know what will happen as you walk your journey with your new friends,

Lastly, have faith with God because no matter what happened He is the only guy that you can hang on, cry on, hug on and most especially depend on everything.  Surrender everything because He knows everything about you.

Until here then