New Millennia New Challenges New Future

Hello readers of my blog good day to you and I hope you had a wonderful Christmas celebration with your loved ones. First of all, I want to say sorry if I didn't update my blog a long time ago. I ran out of creative juices, and a lot of mishaps and victories happened to me, but this time I am back and running again. I will try to update my blog from time to time, and this time I will make sure that my content is full of useful content and learning.

Twenty nineteen has been a roller coaster ride for me. Way too many learning that I have learned in my life that I will take next year. Yes, there are dark lessons that I have encountered this year, but since it will be a new millennium, I will rise to become a stronger and better person. I will be wise and prudent person no matter what the new millennia throws at me.

Since I am reviewing my year, I will start by stating that my culinary era will come to an end since I have decided to change my path. New challenge has bestowed to me and it is about time for me to take up the challenge. I am currently back to school to be your future Social Service Worker. This calling start when I have seen the injustices that surrounded, especially in the industry that I had established myself. Five years in the industry made me realize a lot of things like politics inside the kitchen (I know its everywhere but kitchen world is different politics), not following the Employee Safety Act (Although some kitchens that I work with follows this but most nope), Some kitchens doesn’t follow the sanitation procedures and so on. Besides this horrendous experience, I did work with unionized companies but seemed to be the unions that I was under with are just functioning for job security and protecting these people who are not working, workers who are bullying other workers who are moving and doing the real work, and protecting some workers who are maniac. I also forgot to mention some restaurants if they are missing people the head chef will kill you little by little in the form of filling those positions until you drop dead. These are just the nasty things that I have seen as this industry deteriorates my mental and physical health.

Since this happenings started to get into my nerves like what I have said beforehand, this triggers me to go back to school and change my career. Before this going back to school happens, I have to stand up with my decision to back to school to my mom. Ever since that I was a kid until I started my college days she always pick what program (Course on the other side of the world), but this time since I got tired of what I am doing now I told myself that it is about time to stand up for myself and choose what will make me happy. Since I have seen already the darkness of the culinary world, and there are a lot of oppressions in my surroundings, it’s about time to help those who are in need and be an ally for them.

Moving on, I have also learned that sometimes you have to let God work on your future, not you working towards your future. Also, sometimes you have to be careful when you are using online dating. This year I got victimized by a scammer who made me believe that he is part of US Air force and he made some sorts of stories that his late father has money from Switzerland and he needs a lump sum of money to clear that package out. But thank the good lord that he used my former spiritual director to enlighten me that I have been scammed already, and I have previously reported it to the police. Besides that, I have encountered a maniac on online dating too were all he wants is to have sex with me. I said to myself, “Like seriously, I have to stop this nonsense going to different online dating sites and stick on the group that I have on facebook.”  Aside from this, I also learned that there are people that you have to cut off from your life and never trust them again with your secrets because they cannot keep their promise that they will keep it. I pray that they may realize that what they were doing is wrong and must have a word of honour if someone trusted you with a secret.

Despite that there’s a lot of mishaps that I have experienced this year, there were still blessings that came forward into my life. The first blessing was I went for a cruise with my parents and saw the Bahamas and experience a great time in journey and meet different people across the globe. Another blessing is despite that I my two spiritual directors assigned in different place, I again a new one who can guide my spiritual and vocation journey. Also, I gain new friends in school and online friends. Another blessings would have very close friends who I can turn to when the world is going against me again. Furthermore, I am also thankful that my parents are now supporting my schooling even though I have to stand up against my mom. By the way, I forgot to mention before I start leaving my culinary world I became a summer head cook for a camp outside Toronto. 

Many blessings came to my life that I cannot mention here. What I can say now is that this year God made me realize that everything will be beautiful in the upcoming year. Despite there’s a lot of misfortunes that happened to me, I am clinging to his promise that he will give me abundance of blessings as long as I stick to His hope. This year taught me a lot of things, like being resilient in times of trouble. Always smile when the world is against you. Pray for those people who hurt you and always look for a brighter future ahead of you.

Another era has ended, and a new millennia will come forward in a few days. I cannot say that I am ready to face the modern era but I am not scared to rise above and conquer this next millennia. I will bring all the learnings that I have this year and will use it to become a better, stronger, and a fighter woman. I am still growing as an individual, but I will promise to his new era that I will use this new beginning to explore more and go beyond my comfort zone.

To end this entry, I want to reintroduce myself, and I am Alyssa Palos. I am Cis- Hetero, Catholic, Racialized, Big women and I am your future Social Service Worker. May you have a blessed new year and still Happy Christmas to us Christian Catholics who are reading my blog.

Until here then…God bless us all!

Memento Natalem Christi (Remember its Christmas)

Hello everyone!

How’s everyone doing? I know that I haven’t done any updates since the Easter season. I am sorry about that. I just caught up in a lot of things and events in my life that my writing momentum got halt. I almost tend to lose my passion in writing but I told to myself it’s about time to get it back this Christmas and to commit again myself on my Christmas blogs instead of Christmas Vlogs.

 Anywho, this year was a tremendous challenge for me in a different aspect of life. I was financially challenged, but despite that, I am financially challenged, he still provided me with things that I need. That challenge made me learn how to tighten my belt and to just be contented on what I have on hand. A lot of challenges came in the past months but those challenges gave me lessons and ponderings in life. Not all the time you will have a good life with money. Money really can’t buy happiness. As I continue pondering about my finances; darkness overshadowed my faith journey. That darkness was something that I cannot imagine that I have to really fight back together with my spiritual director. I am so thankful that I have an amazing guide to pray with me and guide me on how to rise above this darkness.

Way too many learnings in the past months that made me strong as a person and as a woman in faith. As I keep this faith that I have, blessing pours down. Blessings that far beyond that I cannot contain in one hand or in a basket. Currently working in a hospital full time with benefits; gain a good guy friend that I can count in from time to time and other good friends that I can count in from time to time.

Despite these blessings and as I work in the hospital setting (Still on my industry), I gained unwanted stress and in addition of this; seeing some veterans/elders and mentally challenged people being wheeled where I take my break. As this two occurs in my current situation; Christmas became an ordinary day for me. I was like in distraught in feeling the season like Christmas is dead to me. Seeing people on their ugly sweater, elves costumes, and other Christmas paraphernalia that I can see still I cannot feel the reason.

Reckoning the 3^rd Sunday of Advent homily; the homilist gave a good question to ponder on and that was so appropriate for the season. The homilist threw this question “What makes you joyful this season?”  It was a good thing to reckon on but like what I have said I cannot feel the essence of Christmas. When I met my spiritual director; and ask him how to cure this feeling and he told me “There is no cure for that. it’s normal even us priests feel that ordinary feeling. Like we are just doing our regular routine. Better offer that feeling up to God and to other people.”

When that short statement got my soul to reckon on things in life; and commenced again my duty at the hospital I keep on seeing these elders being wheeled either on their wheelchair or deathbed. As I see them; I started reckoning about my Memento Mori journey. I may not have a proper journal for that; but it’s been a year that I am reckoning deeds that I have done in my life.

Death is one of the hardest parts that a human can face here on earth. Most of us have a phobia to talk about death and/or face death. Death here on earth is one of the most unwanted cursed that God gave to Adam and Eve when they disobey God’s command to them not to eat the tree of knowledge. I know some of you will say it is science or I am being ridiculous to talk this thing about. I am not a crazy person to talk about this. I know that I am going to die and I will be back in to dust. Reckoning death is a beautiful thing to do. Instead of being stuck in pondering how I can get rich in this world; start pondering on things where how I can use that richness to a deed that can leave a legacy to other people.

Better live a legacy than living material things that you cannot bring to your second life. Memento Mori is such a heavy yet amazing words to ponder on. I know it will be a scary situation but always ask yourself “In what way I can tell God that here is my accomplishment during my life time?” God won’t look in your educational attainment, job experiences, your wealth or any sort of material things that you have again. All he cares is your legacy that you left here on earth. Small deeds can live a mark to other people. Living an unwanted mark to other people will just remember your unruliness or will just forget you. I am not a perfect person no one is perfect but striving to be the best person that you can be and the best version of myself can start a great mark to other people.

Pondering on what my spiritual director said to me and seeing this old people being wheeled on their death bed; I did offer this feeling to them. I know most of them to celebrate their Christmas inside the hospital trying to survive on their wee lives and hoping and praying to God that they can see their grandchildren and/or the whole family before they face our creator. For me, it’s hard to see them on their deathbed but better not to be attached with them. Like, let them fully rest because they have already lived their lives.

Despite it is Christmas and Jesus are the reason to celebrate this yuletide season; don’t forget that we have to prepare ourselves for his second coming or facing him if he called us early to be with him. In addition to what my spiritual director told me; there was a song from Trans-Siberia Orchestra made me also think the essence of Christmas.

Life is really a playful and colourful experience. We may face loads of things but don’t forget that beyond these wonderful experiences; we need to come to an end. We always need to get ready and strive to live to be as pure as we can be.

May you have a Blessed Christmas and the blessing of our good Lord be with you always and I will all keep you in prayers and please keep praying for me. Please include to your prayers our clergy and the church that they may continue to nourish our faith and may God continue to nourish them as they do their ministry.

Until here then

Ad Iesum Per Miriam

A Journey towards Salvation

Hello Everyone and Happy Happy Easter

Buono Pasqua!

Before I start this blog; I just want to welcome all new members of our Catholic faith. Welcome home and for those who are celebrating the birthday in the church this Easter Happy birthday to you.

40 days has been passed and today is the day where our Brother has risen from His tomb. 40 days for contemplation; 40 days of fasting and 40 days of thinking and revisiting our mission here on earth. It's such amazing how this season made us ponder on his life. It is amazing because of His love for us He sacrificed his own life for us. Remembering Fr. Mike's Schmitz video "Fr. Mike's Autobiography"; It's really struck me the part where he said "Every time we saw the cross, that's our autobiography. In every lashing, spitting, shaming, and lastly receiving that wood. We did that and He accepted it because He loves us." (See video <===)

Honestly for me; my journey this Lenten Season was fruitful, life-renewing, and loads of self-realization. I cannot imagine that went into a deep anxiety where I almost let me eaten by this anxiety. During this unwanted pain, suffering and even death for myself; I found resurrection and look forward again to a new life of salvation. I thank the good lord that he send me people who will help me to heal; to get up and break that darkness that I had experience. Not just only that He also send me an event where he totally spoke to me deep within my heart tell me "My daughter let go of that pain, I got your back. Forgive that person who hurt you and used that experience as a lesson of Patience." It made me start to forgive myself that I became bitter to myself because of that happening. It made me start to forgive that person who hurt me. Honestly, I am still in the process of forgiving myself; but on contrary, I have forgiven that person who hurt me and those people who hurt me a long time ago. Funny thing; I thank that person who hurt me for teaching me a lesson. I have no idea why I have done that gesture but I am thankful that person taught me that lesson. 

This made me free, a lot of new doors open, and He made me see things that I haven't seen for in the past years that I am serving him. Blessing poured so much that I cannot contain in one container that I have. Dying is not all about physical death; it's all about spiritual death too. Death from sins will make you far away from your sins but deciding to pick up yourself and to return from His mercy and compassion that's the resurrection that we can claim for. You don't have to experience this kind of event you can experience resurrection by thinking other people that surround you, for example, giving up your sit with an elder or pregnant woman. It's like a simple gesture will make a difference. I just remember a part of my proclaim on our Edge program where I shared a quote of St. John Paul the Great and on the quote ===>

We are the Easter people where we are to speak life, mercy, and compassion to other people. Dying from our worldly lures and sins; will gain consolation towards a place in heaven. 

May you have a blessed and amazing Easter and may the resurrected Christ be the centre of the new Journey that you are walking to. 

Novo Blogsite

Hey Everyone it's me again!

I am happy to announce that I am handling a new blog site.

Yes, I am taking a leap of faith of trying another style of writing. Honestly, I am doing this style of writing since when I was in my high school days but it's about time to revisit it. I have been blogging for a long time but I stop and go. This time I will push myself to update both blogs specially the new one that I am doing right now (It is still on process and I am using the same domain.) 

I will try my best to update the second blog twice a month depends how my mind will move forward. I have no idea with myself why I just decided to create another blog right at this moment.

Here is the link of the new blog site: https://amarepassionisetmortis.blogspot.ca/ (please do not visit this one yet I am still working on this. 1st posting will be coming from my old blog site or on my old journal)

Please follow my Facebook Page Journey Seeker for the updates of the said blog site. Instagram and twitter will be follow I am still deciding whether should I make one or not but please always pay a visit to my Facebook page for updates.

In contrary with this; I will still make sure that this original blog will be updates once or twice a month depending on the issues that I am seeing right before my eyes.

Thank you so much for supporting me and please keep visiting my blog and please please please like my FB page for updates

Until here peeps!

Mens Philosophia

Hey everyone! I know I took a long time to write again. Sorry, It's just that my mind was full of dullness and unruly thoughts and I don't know how to put it into words but this time instead of wasting my freaking time I have to push myself and do something worthwhile.

First thing first; I missed you guise. I am sorry if I am not updating this blog at all. There are certain things that I have do deal with myself as of this moment. I just got this guts to write again despite the fact that my grammar is not that good and concise. Nobody is perfect like what other people say. I am not perfect I still need to fix myself. There are a lot of things that I need to think of; I should say ponder on.

Honestly, I've been to a lot of struggles in life. Like I thought that I am a failure cause I quit my last kitchen work. I have been comparing myself to other people that they are way better than me that's why I am not growing in my chosen field; I loss my passion in cooking because of bad experiences. Not just only that I felt that people that surrounds me left me alone in this battle that I have been facing. As of this moment I am still fighting these demons that I have deep within me. I am still in battle of my pessimistic self and turning this into the lively person that I have used before. Honestly guise it's not easy but I know someone up there is helping me out to see the light again. I forgot to mention I have wasted a lot of tears during this struggle but don't worry I am done with crying. Time to fight once again.

As of this moment I am in the healing process and reclaiming my energy that I have before and seeking myself worth again. This maybe a shaky voyage but I will fight all the krakens and Moby dicks that lingers in my mind. It is soothing enough that someone affirms your self worth in times of darkness and being astray in faith.

For those people who are out there on the same boat with me; I know you can pull yourself out. Yes it will not be easy; but always remember that you are not alone is this world. Think about your family that you have. Think about your friends that you have accumulate all through out the years. Think about your potential within you. Re learn to love yourself you and as you re learn to love yourself you will find your special potential and use that to build your ladder (thank you Martina Stawski for that). Find something that will make yourself busy. Don't forget also keeping faith with God

Yes, sometimes we will experience that darkest pit of our lives but as you push and work with God nothing will be impossible with him. He will put right people in your life and right scenarios that you will see the real beauty of life. Sometimes you have to let go of something to be free. It may be hard but you have to. You have to fight for your life and learn to love the people that loves you.

Despite that I am on my healing and rejuvenating process I am hear to help out. I am not perfect but I am willing to listen. Remember you are not alone in this world.

Until here then

We are one (In commemoration of Pride week)

Hello everyone! I hope everyone is doing well... 

It seems to be that blogging is getting as frequent but let's hope and pray that this will continue all throughout. 

I know it's Pride week here in North America and I don't know it other parts of the world also celebrate this week also. Honestly, nowadays I am getting more disturb that some of us are being discriminated by our fellow human. Honestly, I despise those people who discriminate other people. I am a Catholic-Christian but I do accept everybody. Whatever your gender preference, race, colour, and so on we are one in this world. I know I am getting straight here but I am utmost disturb that some Christians are discriminating this LGBT community. Come on people what does Jesus told us Christians "Love your neighbour, as you love yourself" that's the 2nd greatest commandment. This means that we should accept the people who surrounds us whether they are our friends out enemies. Treasure your friends and pray for your persecutors. Who are we to judge them? Who are we to persecute them? Do you really know their story? If not so do not judge them according to their preference. I do have a lot of gay friends and lesbian friends. I love them for who they are. I know their story that's why I embrace them as my brothers and sisters because they need my help to see God despite of there sexual preference. Being Christian we are being asked to lead people who are lost and astray not to condemn other people. True Christian means living in Jesus way not living in nihilism. 

Just reminding you my dear fellow Christians, Jesus accept all the sinners and the believers. He did not push away sinners, He embraces them like a brother or sister to Him. Don't be like the Jews that trying to be clean. We are all sinners here and we are trying to become as holy as Him and walk his way. I know you will get mad at me but I don't care. Please check yourself first if you are perfect inside and out. No one is perfect in this world. We have imperfections in life that's why we don't have the right to judge other people. 

For my brothers and sisters who belongs at LGBT community, all I can say is I salute you for being you and being true to yourself. I know you are still struggling but I am praying for you and waiting to hear your stories that you made stand for yourself. 

Until here then 

PS: 

To those who are my frequent visitors I know this is kind a weird topic but thank you so much for your understanding

Public announcement

Hello Everyone!

I just want to let you know that I have a facebook page entitled "Journey Seekers" Please like it cause this time forward I will be writing short notes from here to there. I know this is my main blog but please support me also on my notes over facebook.

Thanks a bunch

if you want to follow me on my daily picblog or short vloggings here's my social media

Snapchat: altezzaclaudia
instagram/twitter: jeiyatravels31

Thanks again